So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
It's not meant to be. I also just shot a turkey baster of gin into Nate's eye, so....
you're good to come back. The bouncer pulled me aside and told me. He also said you have nothing to worry about and that you have an awesome "upper punch" or some shit
Well it's official... The first guy I ever gave head to now holds 2 world records. Should I text him asking if I can try and break my record?
New rule. No seeing movies about plane crashes after killer bong rips
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
Hungover, threw up in a cosmetic case in my car this morning. This is real life.
if anyone asks you the platypus in my bathtub is a gift...thats all anyone needs to know
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