last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
It's 10AM, she's drunk blaring veggie tales and I have a paper to write you've got to be fucking kidding me
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
I just got home and someone ate all my chicken nuggets. Bitches be asking for a death sentence?
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
Are you texting me while pooping again?
I'm also playing fetch with the dog
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