Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
i fell asleep last night with fifteen animal crackers in my mouth. rock bottom dude.
I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
FYI If I die in my sleep it is because I drank a bottle of coke from 1986. I needed a mixer
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
I declared today 'Have a Bloody Mary Naked Day'. Why? Because I'm hungover, thirsty & don't want to bother putting on clothes.
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
That's when I realized I was probably naked in the wrong bed
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
And then you screamed, "I JUST WANNA POUR MAPLE SYRUP ALL OVER HIM AND RAVISH HIS BODY!!"
I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want
Randomize