i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
You took a bar mat shot.
Just tell your wife to stay in the car because you are self conscious about drinking infront of her. Now you have a DD AND we can still have a good time.
I just had a dream that I was pulling you around downtown on a sled, from bar to bar. Dear lord if we start that there's no hope for us
So yeah, don't be alarmed when you come home after work to find me eating cookie dough out of a margarita glass with a knife and watching The Little Mermaid. It's been one of those days.
oh my god. picked the worst day ever to not wear underwear...
I'm just gonna stop you right there because there is, in fact, no such thing.
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
I wish so many great beards were not attached to even greater jerks. All that face sitting potential wasted. Some of the greatest tragedies of this century.
I use my feet as sexual weapons
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
I gotta do like a month's worth of catch-up personal hygiene today in prep for Christmas so extended family doesn't ask if I'm depressed.
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize
