he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
Considering the fact that everyone took the wrong jacket from that party, should we casually try to return the chalice and soccer ball we stole from last night?
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
Living alone for four weeks has given me unrealistic expectations of pantslessness.
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
I'm not saying I love you. I never said I love you. I said that if earth blew up like Krypton you'd be the only person I would like to have inside me when our bodies burn up in a fiery inferno
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
Randomize
