She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
And there was a legally blind kid in a ref costume doing surprisingly well at beer pong who was passing out business cards
I swear I can feel something in my uterus. Like, I can feel his sperm searching for an egg. Wtf...
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
"you can only have my number if you answer all the questions on this trivial pursuit card correctly"
I went to the strip club tonight. I had never gone, and in a panic I gave the dancer giving me a lap dance a handshake and introduced myself. Redefines business casual.
Wearing Navy dress whites to a wedding is like having a magical panty removing device. I've never cockblocked a whole room just by existing before.
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
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