paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
Apparently I was playing rock paper scissors against myself for 2 hours in the bathroom mirror.
you're the only person i know to use "jizz" and "cute" in the same sentence.
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
I KNOW. I'm like, ew who are these ppl. And then I remember I'm traveling to New York to accidentally hook it with two different dudes in one weekend.
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
Randomize
