Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
Ok, it is technically a gay bar but it's a total dive w/ strong drinks. The important thing is you can start drinking at 11:00 am without judgement
oh oh oh, and apparently you can bring in your own snacks. Some old dude just gave me cashews and cheetos.
She's like an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, tossed in miller light, inside a question. Nobody can explain a Heather.
I think the closest to heaven you can get in this world is your morning dump after a night of Molly
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
HEY JUST FOUND A SHIT TON OF MONEY IN THE PURSE HE SENT BRB GONNA GO BUY ME SOME MALE STRIPPERS AND BATHE IN THESE TWENTY DOLLAR BILLS
I shoulda been born a dude. There's too much power in a vagina.
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
Googled 'how drunk am I' and it was NOT helpful
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
It is getting ridiculous, the elaborateness of the schemes I have to concoct so my suitemates don't know I'm pooping.
You are currently doing Harry Potter spells with the turkey-baster...
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