What are you doing tonight?
Watching dora the explorer and pining for a sex life.
why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
She eyed me up from across the bar and mouthed "I have no gag reflex".
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
The front desk girl just had that condescending welcome-home-from-your-walk-of-shame face on
It was probably because you set your bra on the couter while you found your ID...
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
My mom just called hysterical. She and her sister found my dead grandma's vibrator.
The apple don't fall far from that tree.
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
Are cops allowed to hit on you if they're in uniform?! Serious question.
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
Randomize
