I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
All I've consumed over the last couple days is Vanilla Coke, semen, and Coors. I don't think today will be any different.
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
i knew as soon as i met you that i was gonna be the designated driver
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
There is not enough soap in the world to make me feel clean after last night. Im gonna need jesus for this one
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
Dude come over...were drunk and I'm holding a T-shirt gun and discovered beer cans are the same size as rolled shirts.
Randomize