he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
My roommate is watching gummy bears "race" from a mega-marshmallow to his lava lamp.
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
I woke up in your kitchen with my ID in my hand and my nails were painted electric blue. Dude.... never let me have fireball again.
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
I made the antidote to the nasty cognac. I AM THE GOD OF MIXED DRINKS.
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
Randomize