There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
I told her the party couldn't handle my playlist LAZERBAWLS and I was right. Cops in the basement, orgy in the kitchen, jousting in the living room.
It's okay I missed my booty call by two whole minutes so I decided to delete him from my phone and then re-add him as "I am a douchelord"
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
I feel awkward having to tell people “sorry you can’t finger me because I will get a UTI and I don’t have health insurance”
Randomize
