i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
I've heard awesome things about their margaritas. I also may buy a mustache from party city. Would you do me with a mustache on??! Hahahaha. But, really.
In other more interesting news I'm going to arrange a surprise orgy. You in?
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
STOP WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING AND GO OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW. THE MOON LOOKS LIKE CATWOMAN
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
Walking my dog and eating a taco in last night's dress.. Classy
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
At what point can I admit that I hate going to house parties?
I don't wanna stand in your shitty kitchen making small talk while I guard the quality booze I brought.
as a side note pls kill me
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
Randomize
