So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
yeah so this exboyfriend of yours reckons you're still together and he punched me in the face cos i slept with you last week. you might wanna have a word with him or at a minimum change your facebook status.
I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
you gave the police officer your chanel wallet and said 'just keep it the i.d. is fake too'.
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
Security brought me back to our hotel room in a wheelchair last night. Vegas.
And if you ever tell anyone that I will fucking kill you.
It was awkward being the only one at the wedding who knows that the bride and groom met when she gave him a lap dance at a strip club
So I just bought underwear that says "I'm taken." Just know that when I cheat on my bf with you, that's what I'm wearing
All right cuz right now I'm in one of those moods where the shear thought of doing anything more strenuous than making a sandwich has me wanting to curl up in the feeble position and splash around in a puddle of my own tears.
ps I'm eating candy off our sex sheets. gotta say the only thing better than sweet tarts is sweet tarts with a hint of sex. perfect post vday situation
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
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