If its vodka, everyone is attractive. Tequila, everyone is dead sexy, single and fuckable.
she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
Today I had sex and flossed at the same time. My relationship goals have been exceeded.
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
Randomize
