just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
I was born with a shot glass in my hand
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
He's fat, has man boobs, and is uncircumsized. I feel like I won the last woman on earth prize.
I can't believe im sexting my roommate. This is really what my life has come to
Hungover like ... in bed with the Brita pitcher and a straw, only opening one eye at a time.
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
by the time the kitchen caught on fire everyone was too drunk to be alarmed. the host just poured beer on it to put it out. how was yours?
Yeah everyone's alive and well besides the still terrifying threat of Ted's conception of a human being
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
The groom's brother was an accomplishment. Then I remembered he was also the officiant. Check and check.
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