No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
I used a jello pudding cup as a shot chaser last night. I'm the Bill Cosby of alcoholics
You were sending me snapchats from a bathtub with your beer helmet on and your boobs out.
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
Building a door into the garage so when I bring girls home my mom doesn't wake up.
Pathetic yet considerate
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
I keep worrying she's gonna have a repeat of the time the ceiling fan was talking in Chinese
Randomize
