That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
They're making scrambled eggs at 2 in the morning... with rum
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
martini and pecan pie.. breakfast of champions.
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
You may now shotgun with the bride
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
i had a super strange, mommy/daddy issuestastic, mildly freudian, i-might-as-well-become-a-stripper-now-and-stop-fighting-the-inevitable dream last night :(
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
Randomize