I think i sorta joined a cult last night
I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
How do you tell if you're on the terrorist watch list?
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
I'm gagging in the liquor aisle just thinking about how much alcohol I'll be drinking this weekend.
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
I just scrubbed chocolate off the bathtub... You better have had a damn good birthday
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
Trumps. I've been wiping my ass with fast food napkins for 3 days.
If you are breathing, I want you at your house. No non-breathing-related excuses.
I swear to the sweet baby jesus I didn't fill your freezer with salsa and my little pony toys, but I didn't stop them either.
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
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