Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
I'm considering telling her about my dream where I made a sex tape with her boyfriend. you know to test our friendship
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
She can't meet us until 830...there's no hope for our sobriety at that hour
I wanted to make fun of someone saying that to an untrained ear, skrillex is blah blah blah. But it was too soon after they said it. And now I can't find it. These are real problems.
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
Found my paycheck. It was in the freezer
Randomize