I feel like I'm in dance class right now
One girl and one boy is just not enough.
im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
he smells like the inside of heather mills' fake leg
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
the cool security guard showed me the video clip of how i sat criss-cross-applesauce on the elevator for 20 minutes last night
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
Its not personal, its just business. I'm the Donald Trump of blowjobs.
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
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