So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
Sleepwalking naked until I was 12 made it so much easier to get away with drinking at moms now.
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
In light of this week's heat-wave, we are having a house vote tonight on the temporary suspension of the "no smoking indoors" clause. Please bring your voting cards to the living room at 6:30pm
Point of Clarification: by "voting card" we mean a full beer and/or shots
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
If I stopped drinking I'd have to take up murdering.
I love how encouraging you are, but I need you to stop me when the guy I'm going home with is a dead ringer for Nick Cage.
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
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