We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
We spent three hours cleaning our room this morning. It was spotless and smelling good. I come home from work tonight and she has already smoked weed in it and "accidently" spilled vodka on the floor.
The cab driver referred to me as his little gumdrop, im sure he won't feel the same when he sees the vomit all over his floor.
The crowning achievement of my weekend was hooking up with someone I'm at least facebook friends with.
After New Year's Eve I will be hibernating my life away. Only wake me up for skiing, schnapps, and sex. In that order.
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
I mean you can't really blame him. He's named after whiskey and I don't get along with pants.
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
Pulling on my sock literally just took me 5 minutes.. The hangover is real
Why does everyone always assume I'm fucking their boyfriends?
You are fucking her boyfriend.
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
Randomize
