She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
What are these yellow papers in the kitchen?
These are the tickets we got last night.
Did i sign this one as Grizzly Bear?
Yes...yes you did.
guys don't fucking realize that the only place girl like their faces jizzed on is in PORN, and that "squirting" is piss. JUST FUCKING PISS.
Haha, bad night?
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
How many times can I tell him that I wasn't expecting sex before he finally figures out that I'm just too lazy to shave?
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
Even my conscience is telling me to take this Wednesday's exam buzzed.
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
yes we're having sex but I'm texting you...so what does that tell you?
Randomize
