I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
I'm covered in salsa and facewash. I think I'm doing something wrong over here.
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers.
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
Dude I walked 1.4 miles through the hotel wearing a cowboy hat, pink topped boots, gucci shades, and a scarf and met my parents in the hallway at 7 am how is this not a good start to Vegas?
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
I gave him my yeast infection. HOW THE FUCK DOES THAT EVEN WORK?
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
Sunburned by dick at the nude beach. Bad. She tried to blow me. But. I. Just. Can't. Saddest day of my life.
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
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