i'm not a human right now. not even a dancer.
TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
so..some girl walked up to me on the porch last night. She came to apologize for peeing on our lawn a few days ago. I just looked at her and said it was ok, she wasn't the first.
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
Stole every fake plant from the lobby and placed it in front of you're apartment door, Enjoy!
i was drunk enough to give the cab driver my number when he said "you talk like you like guys"
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
My cat licked the coke mirror and now is giving me dirty looks. Bet money she has the drip.
I'm trying to cause a divorce, your hooking up with a felon, I think we need Jesus.
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
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