She said her name was "party"
it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
If Megan asks I spilled my water water all over her. I pissed on your roommate. You're welcome. I expect you to keep that on the down low. Seriously tell her the water thing
God damn. I'm really starting to resent babies. They're everywhere. Like fucking land mines.
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
He came so hard that he yelled what sounded like a spell from Harry Potter.
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
Woke up on my sisters couch, and it was like the start of a Terminator movie,my brother in law was passed out on the floor naked in the fetal position. We now call him Arnold. It was an epic night.
I just want you to know you're the worst sister ever.
If this is about me and your ex, it's not my fault she doesn't like men.
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
Randomize