remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
I'm at the casino and some dude apparently has money in an entire row of slot machines. Its like watching a really intense adult version of wack a mole
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
He wants to buy me a drink to apologize for sending me a pic of his dick. Welcome to my life.
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
the girl who hid my weed when the cops came has a birthday coming up. i feel like i should get her something.
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
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