he smells like the inside of heather mills' fake leg
Remember how we wr so drunk last nite we cldnt find whr i shot my load? ...found some of it.
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
Dude, I just scraped frozen vomit from my rooftop
I really wish I could say this is a new low for you
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
Just found a g string in our driveway, wtf happened this weekend?
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
i had a super strange, mommy/daddy issuestastic, mildly freudian, i-might-as-well-become-a-stripper-now-and-stop-fighting-the-inevitable dream last night :(
Bring me that man meat
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
Randomize
