its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
so you masturbated because Oprah told you?
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
I found us a new booze connection and I'm writing college admissions essays. The future is bright.
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
my throat is bruised, my back is scarred, my vagina feels like it's going to fall off.. you're like godzilla. you destroy everything.
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
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