I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
You know your in college when you use the receipt from the liquor store as a bookmark
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
what is it with giant penises always finding me
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
I was all over the place but at every locale you would pop out of nowhere and hand me a huge drink and say "HAMMERED"
I am the fairy godmother of the drink.
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
He literally said I should watch game of thrones while I was blowing him like is this the conversation you want to be having right now
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
I think I just found my soul mate...he's wearing a zebra striped onesie and is into Michael Jackson...I'll explain in the morning.
Randomize
