The pink midgets playing hockey is the EXACT reason cold meds and alcohol do not mix. Period.
Best friends brother. Beat that.
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
Just remembered i had an ordained minister bless my booze last night.
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
did you just send me my own nude
your keys are upstairs on the nightstand or I put them in the hole in the wall
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
Its really hard to take a shit when the dog wont stop trying to crawl into your lap
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
Randomize
