the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
I am going to be in the room whjen you have your first child and spit on its face before its even all the way out of you.
Grow some girl-balls and come out already
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
I literally have been drunk for three days entirely by myself, the world cup may kill me
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
Randomize