i barfeds in our rink
Yeah, but I'm out of licorice and there's no way anywhere near here will rent us all mopeds on a Tuesday night.
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
Friends don't let friends talk to people who live in Orlando. Sorry I've failed you.
I just got a whiff of tequila through the air conditioner.
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
I'm 2 beers deep on an empty stomach, and I just wanna say, I pride myself on my use of commas
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
I bet your mom's never met a girl who's thrown up at the presidential inauguration before though.
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
I'm either hallucinating or there is a dying cat outside my apartment....
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