..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
If I were a boy, I'd name my penis Reptar.
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
When he came he sounded like a flock of birds hitting puberty
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
I won't apologize to a one balled man
I just feel like everything is too perfect
He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator
Or both. Which is common
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
Randomize
