Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
So I got lost trying to find you guys and ended up proposing to a bride in a bachelorette party with a condom.
So this is completely apropos of nothing, but I have a feeling that a friend of mine might be a good match for you. Can I set you two up on a date? Oh, and it seems that we live a block away from each other and aren't having sexy times. This is ridiculous. By the way, there's a chance that I might be a tad drunk. Still though, there's a very *good* chance that you and Mr. X would get along.
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
Does having sex in an airport bathroom with a girl you just met at the bar count as the mile high club? ...no?
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
Randomize