Yea I just took my 1st pregnancy test. Turns out I am just fat. Also I haven't been with anyone in 3 months, which is clearly making me crazy.
Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
only if we run a train.
done.
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
It's "your husband had his mouth on my vagina" awkward.
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
if girls can go out in miniskirts and reveal their thongs, I should be able to wear a sheer dress with boyshorts with the word love bedazzled on my ass.
This is why you're my favorite.
I was trying to pee in the bushes and the person who lived in the house where the bushes were planted started knocking on the window to get me to stop peeing in their bushes
I have so many feelings about this burrito
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
WHY ARE THE COPS ALWAYS AT DENNYS WHEN IMDRUNK!?
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