i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
If you can count on one hand the number of times you have actually, truly nearly died this month, then you are not really living yet.
You kept saying you we're gonna puke and wanted to steal my pants
That does not explain the remnants of a small fire in my bathtub.
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Justin Timberlake, while dressed as Britney Spears. Fuck Jessica Biel, all my 90's dreams are coming true.
I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
you put your dick on my shoulder this morning like it was a fucking parrot
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
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