Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
After we had breakup sex it took him longer to say goodbye to my boobs than it did to me...
my mom snuck into my room, washed her clothes and made her breakfast. what the fuck she's a better boyfriend than I am
Am I supposed to confront my 52-year-old boss/mother of 3 about the fact that we matched on Tinder?
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
Randomize
