Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
i'm high and 74% sure there's a monster in my closet
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
Can you check on Mike in the bathroom. It's been like 20 min.
He's fine. He's just standing at the trash can in line for another beer from the keg. Nbd.
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
Randomize