She's JV to your varsity
My girlfriend went down on me and as she did she hummed the theme from star wars and pretended my dick was a lightsaber...I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
She said, and I quote "how do you run with something that big between your legs".
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
I feel like I owe her child an apology or something after blowing my load on the tattoo she has of her.
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
Randomize