so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
She seriously pointed at the couch and asked me if she could "ride the talking giraffe". I'll never serve everclear again.
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
I'm not a horrible person, I just see what everyone chooses to politely ignore.. And occasionally say it aloud whilst deeply intoxicated.
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
Would it be considered cannibalistic if I wanted to eat off his bacon tattoo?
Well, I found the missing blow... in my fucking suitcase... THIS MORNING. Yeah, I flew from FL to NY with blow in my suitcase yesterday.
I told you to check, dude
Yeah, AFTER I checked my bag and I was already sitting on a plane. Oh well. I figured worst case I'd do like 15 hours in county and I was totally prepared for that anyways. I always prepare for that when we hang out.
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
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