you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
I saw he had me in his phone as "the fat twin"
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
YOU LET ME GO HOME WITH CREEPY RON JEREMY?!?
...and?
I hate when you're right.
Then he texted me that I was the "good kind" of fat.
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
I found more straws in my beard this morning. Please stop doing that.
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
Randomize
