More tranny stories later!
Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
I just got a drinking merit badge from a slutty girl scout
Oh, and thanks to you. I'm now stuck in the living room, held hostage, listening to my roommate's "How I discovered I was bi" story. FUCK YOU.
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
Just pulled back my covers. Jizz. Jizz everywhere. Hipster jizz everywhere on my only set of sheets.
Woke up in a wet suit with my junk cut out. In a strange apartment. Just found thing biggest bong u have ever seen. WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?!
Dear Penis Owner...our records show that you are overdue for servicing...please contact our friendly associates to schedule a thoroughly satisfying experience today...operators are standing by...
I'm just gonna pretend you didn't ask me that. I'll sweep that shattered moment of our friendship under the shame rug.
Have you ever tried to have sex with a fairy? My penis is literally bigger than her.
Are you ok?!
I assume I've stopped bleeding because I haven't passed out, but can't verify currently.
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
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