she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
My vagina just recognized that song.
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
You're just mad because I look hotter in my mug shot than you do in yours
I know. he thinks we're 'meant to be'. No we're fucking not. God wouldn't give my soulmate a pencil dick.
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
My manager gave me an envelope with money in it before he had vacation, and when I asked what it was for, he said it will be his bail money.
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
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