so you masturbated because Oprah told you?
sorry I didn't call you. I had your number saved as "girl that offered bj but didn't follow thru".
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
mom just asked if we are going to need more kaluha as she pulls 5 out of the cupboard. this xmas might kill me
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
hey im sorry i made fun of the color of your sheets, but like it was all i could focus on during sex because they were just THAT UGLY
Randomize
