white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
Girl last night got so wet when I was going on down her it flooded up my nose. I nearly drown
I'm at my inlaws playing Scrabble. Go Fuck Yourself.
That reminds me...we need to get swords
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
You high fived me for banging your sister but lock me outta house bc I ate your pumpkin pie? Priorities bro
Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car.
I got asked if I was pregnant as a pickup line
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
My uterus just tried to get me to buy a tub of cookie dough
I'm hung over and my mom made me go to church. I feel like such a sinner.
I need an aspirin and some dignity.
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