Fat chicks shouldn't bartend
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
He was trying to hotbox the banana suit. Of course we traded him for vodka.
I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
Fucking holidays. How do I have this many men who want to fuck me and none of them are available when I'm ready to blow my top?
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
The guy I hooked up with last night left me alone with his dog AND IT JUST SHIT ON THE FLOOR. WHAT DO I DO
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
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