You answered the door when the cops arrived with a beer in one hand and a pillowcase over your head yelling "GAGA, OOH LA LA!"
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
dude, there's a fucking musical in my head. it's fucking awesome being this high.
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
It's one of those days where you order the free Papa John's pizza so the delivery guy can bring you Coke to go with your rum. The tip was more than the order.
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
He says he invented a new sex move called The Redbird that we can only do when I'm on my period. Should I be concerned?
She said I had a really great aura. Which I think is hippie code for "I bet you can give me a mind melting orgasm"
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
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