I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
That little tingle vodka gives me in my esphagus is what lets me know I'm still alive.
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
you kept saying "i will not *breathe* regret this *breathe* in the morning *breathe* i just gotta remember *breathe* to BREATHE"
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
I've got a 90 day supply of amoxicillin in case of zombie or chlamydia outbreak
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
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