at church Sunday morning I dropped an M&M down my dress and it landed in my bra. I fished it out and ate it. A lot of people saw me.
I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
Do you think it'll be awkward standing up at their wedding knowing I've slept with both the bride and the groom?
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
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