in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
He spent like 5 minutes figuring out how best to position me so I would still be able to watch the game. Maybe there is a benefit to dating a guy who cares about me but doesn't care about my team.
Pretty sure this is the part where you go buy a ring.
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
Pooping to opera.
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